former Champion Bruce Jingles just couldn't sit through Brian Petrasek's comedy set.. so he took control. Owner Tim Chizmar came up to calm him and it evolved from there.. Bruce is very unhappy that he hasn't gotten a TITLE shot since losing to The Cripple Threat Ryan Niemiller.

A Guide To Rapping Like A Pirate Cast and Crew Starring: DeMorge Brown Scott Culver Noah Eichen Written, Directed, Edited by Noah Eichen Shot by Dallas Sterling Music by Kelby Thwaits, Noah EIchen Props by Justin Downing Lyrics: Scott -- What's up DeMorge? DeMorge - Hey Scott, how the heck you be? Scott -- Good. You reading pirate lingo sipping on green tea? DeMorge -- Why yes I am, just trying to brush up my verbal techniques. Scott -- That's cute, but why'ncha let me teach ya how a real pirate speaks. DeMorge -- Oh fo' reals? A Pirate battle? This just got hella real. Scott -- Well you know I'm gonna flog you like a haul does keel. The beat drops out completely. This is a small sketch-type moment. DeMorge looks at him a little confused. DeMorge -- What does that even mean? Haul does Keel That's not even a real pirate phrase. Scott -- You're not a real pirate phrase! Silence. DeMorge contemplates for a moment. Scott looks utterly confused. Demorge refocuses then gets back into it. DeMorge -- LOOK. YOU'VE. Never met a Roger quite as Jolly as me. Scott -- Please, I'll break ya like the crackers I feed my Parrot Polly. DeMorge -- You're gonna have ta wash your mouth out from all the crow you'll be eatin'. Scott -- Not before I swab your deck and leave ya blaggard from this beatin' DeMorge -- Yo Ho-ld up young lass, you better wise up bit. I'll burn the cockles off ya britches from this heat I spit. Scott -- Well flip your deadlights on and watch me swag ya smartly. You're so addled from this chantey have you falling apart D. DeMorge -- Oh please, yer skills are malnourished like a bad case of scurvy. Scott -- Well lets put 'em to the test and see if yer pirate rhymes are worthy. The beat winds down and flips Chopped and Screwed. Scott --I got fifteen men on the dead man's chest. DeMorge -- Ya mean the virgin isles where Blackbeard laid his crew to rest. Scott -- Now, I don't want ta ruin yer Cadillac dreams. But Blackbeards men gave him the business end of a Cutlass Supreme. DeMorge -- Great, well thanks their Scott, really appreciate the history lesson chief, but I gotta run, my wenches pirate booty awaits my grief. Scott -- A pirate treasure!? No way! How can I get some? DeMorge -- Nah man, I'm talkin' popcorn. Trader Joes has a ton-- Someone interjects from off camera. Noah -- Excuse me!? But when you two are finish playing Pirate Patty Cake I'd like to enlighten ye scalawags on some reeeeeal... Ships that sail briny deep where the pirates be treasure huntin'. Pillage and loot ya lives, no quarter lovin'. Dead men tell no tails, when ya see the prow comin'. You're done and done-er-in' bumblin' like yer landlubbin' bretheran. Sink inta Davey Jones Locker in the blink of an eye. And when ya kiss the gunner's daughter better say your goodbyes. Cause theirs no use, ya fools will be used and abused. I'll fill ya paper cuts with lime juice when they choose yer dues. Yeah it stings... But don't hold a gripe. I promise when I come to yer wake I'll play my hornpipe. Noah begins to play his hornpipe (the traditional pirate instrument) and the music takes over his body. He dances furiously to his playing. DeMorge and Scott stare at him utterly confused. He finishes his big number completely out of breath as he's snapped back into reality. He glances back and forth at the gentlemen as he starts to feel uncomfortable. Without warning he takes off running leaving DeMorge and Scott to make sense of the situation. They all look at each other silently for a moment. END